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Back With a Few New Tricks

I just returned from an absolutely fabulous vacation! But damn, I am EXHAUSTED.

Not only was the Atlanta heat tiring, the non-stop paryting as I helped one of my top bitches celebrate her 40th birthday.

Night clubs, shooting range and of course – learning how to climb a pole, clap my booty and do a graceful stand up from my knees at the Pole Waxing University, all made for a kick-ass time.

Yes, booty clapping.

A woman who learns how to move and manipulate her body is only adding to any existing sexuality. The way that sweet and caring country bumpkin worked her mid and lower half was nothing short of amazing, giving me an entirely new respect for exotic dancers.

I figure my sex game is pretty damn good, and anyone lucky enough to have played the Chair Game with me knows how my foreplay is. Adding these new tricks from my trip? I’m a baaaaaaaddddd girl!!!!

After everything is said and done – back to life, back to reality and of course, back to dating.

In fact, I have not so much as logged on to ______.com to check any messages or flirts, but apparently I’m still a hot commodity since I’ve had over 125 profile views and about 50 messages. I can only hope that at LEAST ten of those aren’t fugly, out of state or losers hoping for a second chance.

However, I was in constant contact with someone I had exchanged numbers with just a few days before my vacation, the one I’ve affectionately named Enron. We haven’t even met and I’m calling and texting the “I’m in”or “We’re back at the hotel” and the “I just landed” messages? Oh yes and without a doubt he’s an intriguing man, yet totally transparent with any thoughts and feelings.

What? Still processing the name Enron and what’s behind it? Yes, yes- you better believe the details about this latest candidate will be interesting based on his name alone.

So with that being said, its time to freshen up and throw on my get-it-girl heels.

Date destination – Maggiano’s Italian restaurant. This kid has taste.

Oh yeah- he’s about ___ years younger than me but for the life of me, has the intelligence and wit of a man so much older.

Here it goes!

In the words of Christian Grey….

Laters.

Carmen Jones

Posted from WordPress for BlackBerry.

Hangover - a let down following great excitement or excess. Wow. This one sentence describes nearly all of my dating and relationship experiences! I'm a 30 year-old woman muddling through the Los Angeles dating scene and yes - Believe all that you've heard about the screwed up men and women in La-La Land. This blog is of my actual experiences that will either make you chuckle, laugh out loud or maybe say "aw.....". If your dating hangovers seem worse than the next person's, read on, post a comment and enjoy! Carmen

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