• Dating over 40,  Interracial Dating,  Online Dating,  Red Flags,  Settling or Compromising?,  Understanding Men,  What Women Want

    Program Change 

    While contemplating my next move with Jon B, I’m realizing that aside from him being cute and seemingly good on paper, we really don’t have that much in common or at least nothing else that I can tell because he doesn’t talk about much.   Sure, we both enjoy eating and indulging in cocktails, but other than that I only know that he’s hustling to expand his business, takes a lot of naps and feels slighted that his daughter isn’t too interested in his Skyping calls. That’s it – just the surface and superficial stuff. So as I’m telling a friend about his latest radio silent act like, she silence me the most perfect suggestion: “You need…

  • Dating over 40,  Dating While Black (DWB),  Friends with Benefits,  Interracial Dating,  Swirling (Interracial Dating),  What Women Want

    Down with the Swirl- Part 2

    So it’s been a few weeks of this swirling dating adventure with Jon B and I have a few observations to report. No, not THE actual  R&B crooner hottie himself but as much as the new guy hates being told, that’s exactly who he favors. 😍😍😍😍😍 The Look a Like and I met on a Wednesday, went out that Friday, Saturday AND again that Sunday.  Repeat the following week and again.  What does this mean? Hell, I don’t know. We’re either mildly interested in each other OR we’re just looking for time fillers. I haven’t been able to get a solid reading on the Look a Like, but I’m guessing…

  • Dating Tips,  Online Dating,  What Women Want

    Types of Men to Avoid When Dating 

    Years ago when people actually read email forwards, I remember one that had been circulated quite a few times.  It was called the 12 types of men and while it was really targeted a more”urban” audience with its references to thugs and baby daddies, but still had a few on there that everyone could relate to. Having become a seasoned dater, I can honestly say that I’ve probably dated every type of man there is – both  good and bad.   While it’s true there’s no such thing as perfection with anyone,  there are definitely certain types that can drive you bat shit crazy or close to it. You’ve read about many…

  • Dating over 40,  Interracial Dating,  Online Dating,  Swirling (Interracial Dating),  What Women Want

    Down with the Swirl

    Everything about this latest situation is different.  I woke up this morning to both dogs at the foot of the bed; Thelma on his side and Louise on my side.  Every now and then, feeling each one turning around head as if to make sure we’re in our spot. After snapping the photo of our guardians, I turned over to study the intricate design of his tatted back.  I love the way his olive skin tone allows each detail to pop. Oh yes, I said olive. I said this was different; it’s my first time swirling while dating and I like it. We all know I’ve had plenty of success…

  • Dating Tips,  Dumb Shit Guys Do,  Guest Posts,  What Women Want

    When The Texts Stop Coming

    I think it’s fair to say that we’ve all been in a situation where we met someone new, exchanged numbers and after a few text messages, felt like things may be going in the right direction.  But then the communication starts changing a little bit or those texts stop altogether, leaving you wondering what went wrong and I’m sorry fellas – the men are normally on the receiving end of this confusion. But have you ever wondered what you may have sent that may have turned a woman off? I’ve got a couple of reasons to explain why we stop responding to text messages, so head on over to Digital…

  • Guest Posts,  Sex/Romance,  What Women Want

    Can Incompatibility Be The Problem?

    He’s giving me that look again, rubbing on my leg and talking dirty to me.  I know what he wants and don’t know if I can stomach another round with him. In fact, the last time I almost reached towards the nightstand to get B.O.B. and this was while we were having sex. I have been fortunate enough to have had some marvelous sexual conquests in my life. However just the same, there have been a few men who have fallen short (pun intended) in the bedroom and if this was just someone I was having a little fun with, I would chop it up as a loss and move…

  • Dating over 40,  Dating Tips,  Online Dating,  What Women Want

    5 Things Women Want in a Man

    Someone new reached out to me over the weekend online and sent this: I know there’s  less than a snowball chance in hell that you will even respond to this message, but sending it anyway. Your profile is well written and you’re photos are great,  depicting a woman who’s  at the tip of her game. Yet you’re  single (presumably) and online. This might be out of line, but I’m guessing you’re still single because you’re looking for that perfect guy  on your carefully crafted list of about 101 different things. But maybe… just maybe I’m wrong and if so, you’ll respond and we’ll end up riding off into the sunset.…

  • Friend Zone,  Settling or Compromising?,  Shitty Dating Profiles

    Older Men With Roommates?

    For the love of God,  why are there so many men with roommates in Los Angeles???? I haven’t even begun to share the details about the guy I’m supposed to be dating “exclusively” because I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to have agreed to that, and so soon. So in my moment of doubt  (and being a tad bit trifling), I went ahead and signed up on another dating site.  You know, to poke around a little bit a see if I stumbled on someone who has it a little more together. And guess what  happened today? I exchanged numbers with a guy who seemed interesting enough. …

  • Dating Over 30,  First Dates,  Friend Zone

    Great First Dates

    We might have a winner! We might have a winner! We might have a winner! In case the point isn’t being emphasized enough, I think we might have a winner so let’s just call him Winner! Last night’s date was a smashing success and even better, the feeling is mutual since we ended the night by texting each other pretty much the same thing and woke up texting nearly the same words as last night which – we were happy to have met, enjoyed the relaxed and open conversation an agreed how everything flowed effortlessly.  Our chemistry was amazing and if you were looking over at our table while we…

  • Dating Over 30,  Friend Zone

    We’re Just Friends

    I felt some kind of way about one of the guys who has been in the friend zone now for about 3 years and it was a cross between empathy and not giving a shit, with the scales tipping closer to the latter. Should women like me feel guilty because we have one, two or ten men in the friend zone? I say no, unless we’re giving them some false hope that they can actually be something more. The guy I’m talking about?  He’s nice, thoughtful and considerate but this is exactly where he will be as far as the eyes can see but sometimes I feel sorry for him. As I…