• My Dating Hangovers

    Single With Benefits

    I’m still here and yes, still single. This chick here has been quite busy over the holidays and am just now starting to get into the swing of things after ending the year trying to knock out some of my goals that I’d set which included the usual suspects such as:  losing weight, saving money, traveling, meeting “him” and purchasing a home. The bad news is when it came to losing a couple of pounds and meeting him I failed, failed, failed.  I got nothing, nada, zero, zilch to offer for either of those two major goals. The good news is that I hit two of the major ones out…

  • Dating Over 30,  First Dates,  Friend Zone

    Great First Dates

    We might have a winner! We might have a winner! We might have a winner! In case the point isn’t being emphasized enough, I think we might have a winner so let’s just call him Winner! Last night’s date was a smashing success and even better, the feeling is mutual since we ended the night by texting each other pretty much the same thing and woke up texting nearly the same words as last night which – we were happy to have met, enjoyed the relaxed and open conversation an agreed how everything flowed effortlessly.  Our chemistry was amazing and if you were looking over at our table while we…

  • Friends with Benefits,  Single Girl Problems

    When a Woman’s Ready to Go

    Here’s how you blow up 18 years in a single text message: “I’m such a punk because I should have said this last night. I can NOT separate these (new) emotions from amazing sexual chemistry and with each visit,  it gets worse. Confuses me and I send stupid shit like this. But… I do want sooooo much more in my life than just an occasional tryst, no matter how incredible.  I know what I want and you can’t give me that. So for me, it feels like I’m settling and I can’t do that. Not the best way to tell you and for that I’m sorry.” I’ve said this before…

  • Friends with Benefits,  Settling or Compromising?,  Sex/Romance,  Single Girl Problems

    Breaking the Rules

    Rule #1 of having a friend with benefits – don’t catch feelings. Rule #2 of having a friend with benefits – don’t catch feelings. If only there was a manual for how to successfully carry on with this type of thing.  Too bad I never thought to read 10 Simple Rules to Maintaining a Successful Sex Buddy Relationship. Here’s my deal. In an effort to minimize my slut factor throughout the years, I have kept the company of two male “companions” whose sole purpose in my life was to dick me down.  No drama, no dating, no regular telephone calls and no questioning of each other’s dealings or actions in anyway.…

  • Settling or Compromising?,  Sex/Romance

    That One Connection

    I’m addicted to him. I realize this addiction after my latest encounter with Papi just a while ago, and while we have been at the sexual affair for almost 20 years, the unthinkable seems to be happening. It just keeps getting better and this feeling is what frightens me the most. Incredibly sensual and the chemistry is always intense.  The kind of interactions that most people will never experience in a life time. We continue to explore and no take each other’s bodies to another level.  So tonight, it was my turn to be the dominant as I talked and nanny instructed him through each and every touch, kiss and…

  • Friends with Benefits

    Girl, Don’t Send That Text!

     If someone is struggling with an addiction or having suicidal tendencies, there’s help.   One call to a dedicated number can offer support, fresh perspectives and hopefully prevent someone from doing something they’ll end up regretting. So why in the hell has no one ever created a crisis hot line for dating? You know we need it! There’s always some man or woman acting a god damn fool over someone they’ve been dealing with and shit has taken a turn for the worse.  They’re about to send some convoluted text message, blow up someone’s phone and leave some stalker-ish message that’s about five minutes long or worse – go on over…

  • Sex/Romance

    Fifty Shades of…

    Last night’s date with a man I originally met over two years ago was painstakingly boring and from the moment we walked into a local spot for a few drinks, my mind was already wandering to the dirty limits. Who was I going to fuck once I get rid of this sappy dude?  Sounds pretty bad to think about a man while in the presence of another but it is what it is.  The night (finally) came to an end with a church hug and as soon as this ass hit the seat, I was looking at my phone wondering who would be the suitor of choice. The first person…

  • Settling or Compromising?,  The Non Committal Man or Woman,  Uncategorized

    Pedal Slowly OR Just Stop?

     “Damn Carmen, it sounds like you are further ahead with things than he is, so I’m not saying get rid of him altogether but you may need to just pedal slower and allow him time to catch up.  Then on the other hand, he’s acting like a man and telling you what you want to hear because if he’s realized you are that good of a woman, he’s not going to want to let go.  That’s the reality of the game.  I think you need to cut out the benefits so he doesn’t have his cake and eat it too because the way I see it is this – a…

  • Friends with Benefits,  Sex/Romance,  Uncategorized

    The Crymax Experience

    “Move your arms again and I will punish you and go harder, do you understand? Keep them up just like that.  I told you when I saw you again; I was going to make sure we parted ways with you being extremely satisfied.” I can remember nodding followed by some kind of inaudible sound coming out of my mouth, which wasn’t good enough so he responded with a devilish grin and a deep thrust.   The reaction to that was a loud yelp and “Okay sweetie, I’m sorry” which turned him on even more as he began to rhythmically drill into hidden corners inside of me. Soft whimpers of pleasure escaped my…

  • Friends with Benefits,  Sex/Romance

    Things to Do Before Vacation

      After 6 days of soaking in the blazing sun, sipping Sammy Sosas by the pool, and reveling in the beauty of the country and people of the Dominican Republic, I’m back! Back to reality, back to life, back to the dating scene and as much as I hate to say it, back to the hangovers that come with dating.  But everything has a priority after such a fabulous vacation, so I thought I would share my checklist of things to do: 1. Unpack 2. Rest and flush kidneys 3. Mind blowing sex 4. Have multiple orgasms 5. More sex 6. First date with new guy 7. More sex and…

  • Uncategorized

    No, We Can’t Be Friends

     For some reason, I have tried to convince myself that being more flexible and allowing for change in life will often result in good. Yet when it comes to dating and my relationships, this thought process always backfires and causes more headache than is worth. Some people often tell me that I'm a bit too extreme especially when it comes to men, and the "you should at least keep him as a friend" bullshit comes up. If I started out being interested in someone for relationship potential and things don't work out, what's the point? Now I'm not talking about the person you may have spent a lot of time…

  • Bad First Dates,  Uncategorized,  When you're dating your ex

    Suffering From Dating Burnout

    If only I had the energy to share the plethora of events that took place this past weekend, and normally there is never a dull moment.  I accepted a double dog dare and ended up riding a mechanical bull for the first time, successfully managing to keep all body parts inside  of my clothing.  Next, I had the pleasure of taking in the sights of Marina del Rey while talking about real estate dreams in between several snack runs to a few 7 Eleven stores which led up to the closing ceremonies of the weekend where my fears of becoming the latest nightclub shooting casualty because someone had a crazy temper and hood mentality. Oh- the last…

  • Uncategorized

    Shoes or No Shoes

    I’m not sure what has come over me lately, but since having given up any potential ANYTHING with the lingering hangovers, my hormones have been on overload. More like on speed. Or even meth. So while one part of me is contemplating the dive back into the world of dating tonight, another part of me is saying “Last week needs to be an encore”. Hmm… As I struggle with deciding which of the goodies in my top drawer I’ll end up with, the color I love the most ends up being the winner – purple. Satin. But wait just a moment, I’m jumping ahead a hit. Here is what a…