• THIS is Why I'm Single!

    Stop Over Thinking, It’s Just Great Sex

    An overwhelming instinct to protect myself from certain situations that can be detrimental to my well-being has suddenly kicked into overdrive. This is really just a fancy way of saying whenever I’m feeling like the situation with a man is a little confusing or uncomfortable for me, the anchor comes up and this old ship gets to sailing. It’s funny (well, not really) how just a few days ago I was skipping through the field of daisies, still on a high after the latest tryst with my long-term cut buddy Papi which I’ll say again, was one of the best sessions. I could just brush it off as having been…

  • THIS is Why I'm Single!,  Uncategorized

    Nice Guys Always…

    Finish last. Sadly, it’s true.  I seem to be attracted to every man that is wrong for me and when one comes along who is all things great in so many areas, I can’t force attraction that isn’t there. This must be a curse. I just had a lovely dinner and an entertaining conversation with one of the hangovers from a few months back.  We had gone out a few times during the Out of Sight era and the poor guy- he could never figure out why things sort of stalled. I know why and as he said “I’m still feeling you a lot even though you kind of blew…

  • Uncategorized

    No Longer Accepting Applications

    Just like that employer deciding that the maximum number of applications for an open position has been reached, I have officially closed out my online dating profile so of course this could mean one of two things.  The first being the optimistic stance that a wonderful person is now filling my phone with “good morning beautiful” messages, calls just to say hello and bonding time getting to know one another.  OR we could go with the reality of how draining and mentally and emotionally exhausting dating can be when you continue meeting the types of men you wished were all in a landfill somewhere being shitted on daily by flocks…

  • Online Dating,  Settling or Compromising?,  THIS is Why I'm Single!

    One to Grow On

      It’s a new day and my mind is doing far too much thinking about this dating situation with the latest candidate who I’m still hoping doesn’t end up becoming one of the hangovers.  God knows there have been too many in a span of about five months, so while a lot of those good old feelings about a man that have been lying dormant have returned, there’s also a familiar feeling that isn’t so good.  The dreaded feeling that my hopes for a positive outcome to my dating bliss thus far with Balance will soon begin to sour. I mentioned last week that Balance was an older man –…

  • My Dating Hangovers,  Red Flags,  Uncategorized

    Who’s Looking For Perfection?

      “So the man has issues, at least he’s willing to spring for a $500 per night date.  Stop looking for perfection and just roll with him”. These are the words heard from a good friend ealier this week who tried to chastize me for complaining that I had a great time with Tall Glass of Wine, but realized why I decided not to continue dating him months back.   Initially, I felt a little bad because overall, he is a really great guy.  On the surface, at least.  However, just a few moments later I realized she was wrong, wrong, wrong and that I was not looking for perfection at…

  • Break Ups,  Married Men,  My Dating Hangovers,  Uncategorized,  When you're dating your ex

    Did we make up or WHAT?

         “You really need to update the blog so your readers know this is what really happens when you’re dealing with relationship issues”.  I wouldn’t expect to hear something like this from a man, and especially not Special Agent but this is what he told me when I shared that there was a little more than “talking” when Rescue and I saw each other last week. Oh wait – I guess I should mention that I told Special Agent about this face to face.  While on my weekend getaway with the girls down in his neck of the woods, he drove up to the resort making it our second time…

  • Break Ups,  Married Men,  My Dating Hangovers,  Relationship 101,  When you're dating your ex

    A Week of Revelations

                      A Week of Revelations “Only time will tell what happens with him or any of these other three OR any of the others I didn’t have time to mention here.”  I guess the most appropriate place to begin this post is by starting where I left off.  It’s been a little over a week since I last posted and other than the occasional feelings of disappointment, reasoning and a slew of other thoughts and random emotions, not much has really happened directly.  Meaning, I’ve finally taken my own advice of just sitting back and observing what is transpiring in my life…

  • Married Men,  My Dating Hangovers,  Settling or Compromising?,  THIS is Why I'm Single!,  When you're dating your ex

    A Tale of Four Men

    Blame the bastards at Hewlett Packard for my delays in posting!  Yes, my laptop is truly on its last leg and I haven’t been able to access the Internet in almost two weeks.  Of course there’s the back-up plan using the Blackberry tool but it’s just easier in front of a real computer to spew out these different thoughts going through my head. I hope you’re ready to read and are NOT reading from a cell phone; otherwise a carpal-tunnel like sensation will develop from scrolling. Let’s go! Currently, there are four men I’ve been in contact with.  Any real contenders for anything?  I’m not sure but from the sign…

  • Break Ups,  My Dating Hangovers,  Relationship 101

    I’m Back!!!!!!

      “Come back to Jamaica…. our home is your home…” I know I’m totally dating myself, but does anyone else remember that little jingle from back in the 80’s?  Let me just say that Montego Bay was everything I had hoped it could be and then some. I’ve been back in town now for almost a week and have been trying to catch up on life which really is a buzz kill after partying, drinking and relaxing as if I didn’t have a care in the world. Another song comes to mind – “Back to life, back to reality, back to the hear and now….” Oh well. How about some…

  • Break Ups,  Married Men,  My Dating Hangovers,  Red Flags,  When you're dating your ex

    Part Deaux

      It has been eight days since Rescue and I had our latest "incident", seven days since we last saw each other, and six days since I apologized and two hours have passed since he and I had what I hope was the beginning of a break through conversation. Yes, I apologized and the reason why is simple:  Men and women think differently. This is by no means a statement that has never been heard before, but at that moment when I pulled over to the side of the road and inhaled, then exhaled before making my call to him I realized this was the gospel truth. Now before I go on…

  • Married Men,  My Dating Hangovers,  Red Flags,  Relationship 101,  Settling or Compromising?,  When you're dating your ex

    The winds are changing…

      And those bitches are like the Santa Ana's in the dead of summer - hot and swift. It was just a week or so ago that Kim sent me a BBM ladened with her latest dating woes and said- "Damn girl, things are going so well with you and Rescue, we won't have anything to read on the blog".  My reply was "I wouldnt necessarily say that because there is a big issue that keeps eating away at me, so I can't even say I'm in the clear". Bless her heart when she says “well, at least you’re 1/4 of the way”. Aw… Genuine happiness from a friend who…

  • My Dating Hangovers,  Red Flags,  Relationship 101,  THIS is Why I'm Single!

    Are we compatible?

    So not what I wanted to read today:  “…On the face of it, a combination between Capricorn and Libra may not seem the best of matches…” As much as I enjoy reading my horoscope to see how accurate, twisted or completely WRONG the forecast may be, one area I’d never really given much thought to was the compatibility aspect.  I’m not one of those special people who have to read it every day to see if I’m going to have the best day ever or a crappy-should-stay-at-home kind of day, figure if I should pay my rent or buy a new pair of shoes or if I should break up a…

  • My Dating Hangovers,  Relationship 101,  THIS is Why I'm Single!,  Uncategorized

    72 Hour Gag Order

      The stages of a break-up. We’re probably familiar with what they are or may have at least heard of them, but they’re the different transitions we go through with our minds and emotions that are really on the verge of a break-DOWN, depending on how involved you are with your significant other, boyfriend or husband.  I’m not really interested in the transitions from one to the next but really, the first couple of days after a break-up. How are you feeling? Hurt, angry, lonely, confused or numb.   Blind-sided, guilty (depending on if it was something YOU did) or stupid. Whatever flows out of the flood gate of emotions, I think that…

  • My Dating Hangovers,  Red Flags,  Relationship 101,  THIS is Why I'm Single!

    Closed Mouths Don’t Get Fed

    Finally, the end of the day is here! When you’ve got a lot of stuff on your mind, doesn’t the 8-hour work day seem more like a 28 hour flight sandwiched between two large people with no a/c and a bad itch down there?  Yep, pretty much like torture. So here’s part two of this morning’s surface street and bathroom post, “My Hump Wednesday” and while I’m still emotional and pissed off at this monkey wrench being thrown into the mix,  I probably shouldn’t make any decisions nor should I even be writing about this latest hangover in training but f!ck it, here it is.  Rescue’s actions are making me question my own…

  • My Dating Hangovers,  THIS is Why I'm Single!,  Uncategorized

    My Hump Wednesday

    I know you should never leave home angry but as I hope to catch more red lights than ever before to write this, I’m pretty upset. Okay, understatement. Pretty pissed. I’m trying to figure out what I’m so upset, replaying how I just stomped out of the house moments ago without the usual kiss and parting words for Rescue. Instead, a flip of the light switch and a really “firm” closing of the door was how I exited stage left.  I don’t think I’m able to do this. THIS meaning continuing to engage in this unrelationship with him, at least not on the current level. The morning started off well…