The holidays have arrived! While most people are blogging and posting about their plans to spend time with their loved ones, there are others who probably dread this time of year as much as a trip to the dentist for a root canal. Maybe it’s the cold weather, but something about winter seems to scream out you’re SINGLE and ALONE!!!!!!
Why didn’t I plan this year better? While I was partying during the spring and summer, “doing me”, I should have been collecting potential partners and hoarding them like a squirrel does with nuts for the winter. But noooooooooo, I was busy doing me not even thinking that once August ended, it was not only the end of summer but the beginning of the holiday season. Noooooo, I didn’t stay in the relationship with the unstable, bipolar, ex-Marine with suicidal tendencies who was a pathological liar, I just had to dump him (insert sarcasm here).
What’s funny is a text message exchange with a potential suitor last week about this very subject, as the guy and I complained about how cold it’s been. I thought it was ironic that a man would actually admit something many of us probably think, but wouldn’t have the nerve to actually share with anyone else, especially the opposite sex. I know, I know – posting someone’s text message on the World Wide Web is the ultimate invasion of privacy, but I feel like I just had share:
“The start of the holidays signals the beginning of the off season for bachelors. We start getting lonely here and there. Women will even settle to be with a dude for the holidays OR they start demanding to be more than “buddies”. Either way, our prospects dry up. So we work on our bodies, handle the cosmetic dentistry, hook up our cars, tighten up the pad, etc…”
I consider the holidays the “winter slowdown” of dating and suddenly I have visions of having my feet massaged as I readjust my Snuggie. I’m whispering sweet nothings in the ear of my significant other as we relax in front of a nice fire, sipping on the best bottle of wine Trader Joe’s could offer. I then snap back to reality, reminding myself I am one of those people – I’m single, I’m a leftover.
Now is not the time for the party or clubbing scene, hanging out late and returning home to scroll through the address book for a night cap and I agreed; I’m not in the mood for any lame ass girls night out sessions with the bitter single women OR corny and bored married women who wished they were single, only to return home wondering if I should put in a call for a little action to the guy I’m in the unrelationship with.
Think about it – when are you most likely to consider settling with someone who isn’t all that attractive, has qualities you really don’t care for or probably gets on your nerves most times? When it is cold and your activities and social life starts to dry up a bit. He or she may even be an ex you’ve dipped back with or a f@ck buddy with a little potential. Suddenly, you develop something called tolerance.
Why should I care? Should I be concerned about my singlehood during the holidays just because I would like to have a reliable Christmas party date or someone to do a little shopping for? Or better yet, because it’s too damn cold to be standing in line waiting to get in a club. A date night with Mr. I Don’t Think So seems better than a night home alone watching my dvr recordings.
Starting in January, I’ll make sure to plan for a better off-season.
Carmen
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