My Dating HangoversSettling or Compromising?THIS is Why I'm Single!

The F%ck Buddy


Some of us may be confused about our status, some may know exactly what you are to a man or woman but are in denial and there are some who have never heard of this phrase, the Fuck Buddy (FB).

I know exactly what it is, I’ve created one.  Not to be confused with the unrelationship status, this is a person who serves one main purpose.  Fuck me and do it well.

Now before you start judging me, let me explain that I have the needs. These needs consist of me getting my world rocked, my hair blown back and on a regular basis This is where my buddy, Good on Paper, comes in.

The sexual chemistry is and has always amazing between the two of us and I’m not talking about the walk through the door, pants dropped to the ankle, quickie type of trysts.

Instead, we have mind-blowing, very interactive, multi orgasmic sessions each and every time and I’m sure the neighbors know our names.  From the living room, prop and blind-fold filled sessions to the glass-streaking shower moments that seem like they’re straight out of a movie, my buddy fulfills me in every way imaginable when we are together.

If I were to rate him (Yes Esme, I’m getting  to that little “project”), he would be a 9.5 out of 10.  I’m getting chills just thinking about our activities.  My buddy.

The good thing is that we know our purpose in each other’s lives and meet the true definition of what a FB really is.

He or she is a partner with whom one occasionally has sex with, barring any emotional* attachment (*also known as strings).  This is a person who is not your boyfriend or girlfriend and you may or may not have a special connection with and really, is the non-committal person’s dream because it often times includes all of the benefits of being in a relationship, but without all of the drama that makes someone want to remain single. 

The FB is able to get away with things that would normally spark a heated debate or argument such as:

– Not having to call or see you regularly

– Able to forget birthdays or other milestones

– Completely SKIPPING Valentine’s Day and probably be missing in action that entire day

– Is exempt from needing to contact you during holidays

– Spending quality time

Just in case anyone is still confused or not all that familiar with this, a FB is synonymous with being referred to as a booty call, friend with benefits, cut buddy or kick it partner.


Many of you know that I am very much interested in being in a committed relationship, and I am not interested in having random affairs or casual sex with potential prospects while trying to weed out the right one.  

It’s just that sometimes we come across a person who has wonderful traits, is attractive and appealing in so many ways, but just hasn’t expressed an interest in wanting anything more. Or they just aren’t relationship material. 

So for now, my “visits” with Good on Paper are sufficient and as long as the two of us are truly content with this type of situation, it will work out.

Don’t get me wrong here,  because sometimes I do wonder if I’m cheating myself.

Maybe, maybe not.

I keep telling myself I’ll know when to break it off when I meet someone who is great relationship material, but until then, I’ll be riding this one until the wheels fall off!

Until there’s a cure…

Carmen Jones

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Hangover - a let down following great excitement or excess. Wow. This one sentence describes nearly all of my dating and relationship experiences!

I'm a 30 year-old woman muddling through the Los Angeles dating scene and yes - Believe all that you've heard about the screwed up men and women in La-La Land.

This blog is of my actual experiences that will either make you chuckle, laugh out loud or maybe say "aw.....".

If your dating hangovers seem worse than the next person's, read on, post a comment and enjoy!



  1. No judging here – as long as it’s working for you ad nobody’s getting hurt then go for it! It’s nice to know that not all single people are completely frustrated in that department! As long as you remain aware (as you clearly are at the moment) that you’re hoping to find a committed relationship at some point and that you’ll need to be able to break it off at that point, I don’t see why you should have to sit at home alone all the time until then. And 10 out of 10, wow – you go girl!

  2. You know Matt, that is exactly how I look at it and YES! There are many sexually frustrated singles out there, hell, truth be told, those in relationships and married arent being satisfied there. So yes, for now it works.
    I sometimes think to myself if my buddy could be good for anything else, especially when he does confusing things like calling to “say hi” or sending “I really miss you” type of messages. Confuses things a bit but of course, his actions (or lack thereof) reaffirm that we are only meant to be together in the shower or between the sheets. And yahoo! There havent been man 10’s! I think the fact that we role play, have such energy and intensity and are both up for multiple rounds is what gives him such a high score.

    I could only hope that others could experience such bliss.

    Insert *ah* here! Lol

  3. Aahhh…I love f@ck buddies…especially 10’s…
    I see no harm in buddies, as I make it plainly aware in my blog 🙂 Usually I am the one breaking it off, not them! Why should I sit at home all frustrated when there are several people that will serve a specific purpose? Nah…guys have used up for plenty of years for sex. No reason to not return the favor! And I love being able to kick them out of my bed, being able to leave, not having to call, telling v-day to go to hell, etc. For right now, I am all up on that shit until Mr. Right-for-me comes along 😉
    And I can’t wait to read your project!

  4. 10 of 10? Carmen, be reasonable.

    10’s are only possible with Asian girls.

    Also, I want a delineated list of traits for both Fbuddies and “Unrelationship status” (curious about that one).

  5. Caleb NO!!!! Only Asian girls? That “me sucky sucky, love you long time” image is still in existence? Uh… think you’ve got some exploring to do and I’m curious – exactly what is it that they “allegedly” can do that is so damn appealing? Okay, sure that is an entirely different post and you got it – I will surely give my take on the difference between the fbuddies and unrelationship status. The lines get blurred on the two. A LOT.

  6. Absolutely no judging here! Problem is that I find myself in situations where you said there would be conflict – I catch feelings. For some reason, no matter how much I tell myself I won’t, I often end up becoming interested in the guy more than I’d planned it. Maybe I’m just weak but I agree with what someone else said, I’m not going to be frustrated in THAT department when it’s bad enough I’m still working on finding that potential mate. F$%& buddy is a great substitute to AA batteries. =0

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