Friends with Benefits

Girl, Don’t Send That Text!

Girl, Don’t Send That Text!

 wpid-screenshotedits-1.pngIf someone is struggling with an addiction or having suicidal tendencies, there’s help.   One call to a dedicated number can offer support, fresh perspectives and hopefully prevent someone from doing something they’ll end up regretting.

So why in the hell has no one ever created a crisis hot line for dating? You know we need it!

There’s always some man or woman acting a god damn fool over someone they’ve been dealing with and shit has taken a turn for the worse.  They’re about to send some convoluted text message, blow up someone’s phone and leave some stalker-ish message that’s about five minutes long or worse – go on over to the house and wait for someone to “talk face to face”.

The end result is always something foolish,  only to be regretted soon after  so there needs to be a dedicated friend and number for these occasions.   Just imagine something like that special red phone you see in the movies where some dude is waiting for the word – detonate the bomb or diffuse it.

This is what I was thinking about before speaking to a friend of mine this evening.   She had been calling me a few times throughout the day, but we kept missing each other.  Finally, she yells out I really need to speak with you and it’s about some guy she’s been seeing for about a month.

Sadly,  I was too late.

I wasn’t there waiting on the crisis line to help her earlier and as a result she violated each and every rule of dating.   Especially when there’s no commitment AND things are too new.  She caught feelings for a man who was on one of those “doing me” kicks,  she got emotional, said some things, then texted some things, then just had to leave a lengthy voicemail to recap her feelings.

You’ve already done the damage and now you’re calling me wondering what to do?  Shit,  this was like telling me you forgot to pay the bill after the lights have been out for a week.  The damage is done so now this is more like a recovery mission instead of a rescue. A dating crisis hot line could have helped but instead,  there’s now another man thinking that women are nothing more than emotional basket cases.

Ladies, here’s a tip that has taken me many many years to learn – we don’t always have to respond or say something and if we do, it does NOT have to be right now.  Let some of these situations marinate a bit, then plan your attack  course of action and while your girlfriend on the other line may not be an expert it’s still better than your irrational and hasty behavior.

Until there’s a cure….

Carmen Jones
http:// mydatinghangovers.com
myhangovers@gmail.com

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Hangover - a let down following great excitement or excess. Wow. This one sentence describes nearly all of my dating and relationship experiences!

I'm a 30 year-old woman muddling through the Los Angeles dating scene and yes - Believe all that you've heard about the screwed up men and women in La-La Land.

This blog is of my actual experiences that will either make you chuckle, laugh out loud or maybe say "aw.....".

If your dating hangovers seem worse than the next person's, read on, post a comment and enjoy!

Carmen

7 comments

    1. Dustin, I couldn’t deny that crazy part if I tried BUT let’s be fair- the antics and bs dished out from “some” men attributes to the craziness. Like I said, as long as the person she’s reaching out to is in the right state of mind, running a situation by someone else before firing off so kooky message or popping up at a guys place, never hurts.

  1. I can’t count how many times I’ve been pissed at a guy and sent a bunch of text messages that I regretted sending right after. Too bad there isn’t a undo option for those kinds of messages but I like the friend line idea too!!!

    1. My motto is to observe the 72 hour rule. Wait it out for 3 days after a bad fight or a break up and then take action. I’ve learned this one the hard way for sure based on past relationships. One of the hangovers had a key to my place and I broke it off with him, told him to buzz off etc…. the next day we were working things out, after I spent $80 on a locksmith.

  2. I’d like to use a lifeline! This is hilarious but so true because I certainly have done some crazy stuff in my day. I suffer from the irresistible urge to respond and have the last word so waiting before sending a text or some crazy phone call.

    1. I’m often guilty if that as well Sabreena- the urge to make my point. But we all knew that backfires most of the time and ends up being a waste of energy.

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