I Tried

There are a couple of things a woman can do at the end of the date that was a bust. She can make a call to one of her girlfriends offering up a play-by-play of things went, find something else to get into so the night doesn’t end up being a total waste or be a dud and just head back home.

I opted for something else.

A few shakes of the hair to make those curls fall in place, freshening up of the lipstick and the perfect resting bitch face meant it was time for a selfie, which was sent to him in a text message with no words – just the photo.

Within 5 minutes Papi had replied with “Should I be on my way?”

Of course he should be on his way and I chuckled a little at the thought of him even asking because he knows good and damn well exactly how this dysfunctional situationship. I illuminate the bat signal and he arrives on my doorstep ready to handle whatever is being thrown his way.

It’s him and yes – I swore him off completely just a month or so ago but maybe it’s as simple as me having missed him and not just because I had a crappy date. But as always, he allows himself to be a passenger on this rollercoaster of mine. He gets off, walks around for a little bit then comes right back for another ride and as always, allowing me to call all of the shots.

“I miss your soft touch, your scent. I miss watching you sleep and listening to you breathe heavily….”

Or maybe it was because we missed each other.

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, but how about its affect on your libido because it’s amazing what swearing off sex with a person can do to you. What’s even more amazing is the gaps in time we’ve had for as long as two years that seemed nowhere near as intense as our reunion after this brief month plus hiatus. You would think twenty years had gone by.

So in he walks and at first, we’re doing nothing more than talking about the events of our day and our issues until the conversation ceases and he begins to undress me.

Once we are both completely naked Papi whispers in my ear that “we are about to make love and forget about everything else that happened today”, and it was at that moment that my body felt as if it was in a state of shock. Suddenly, I felt warm all over and could feel my temperature rising with each touch from his fingers and when we got to that first kiss it was over. That kiss that felt as if he was telling me everything he ever wanted to say with his mouth all while entering inside of me at the same time was just too much, making me climax so violently I need a couple of minutes of recovery before we could continue.

It’s really like that.

Nearly every time with a different level of satisfaction each time we are together. Just thinking about our encounter makes me groin throb so can someone please tell me, how the hell (and why would you want to) sever ties with that?

Until there’s  a cure for the dating hangovers…

Carmen Jones